Repentance

Close to 0040 hours. Just finished reading an article about Guenther Grass. He was awarded the Nobel(lit) in 1999. Now he admits to serving on the Schutzstaffel.
Germans-Nazis-Hitler-Schindler’s list!!! As one grows old, perhaps one feels the need to go back in time and do better the things of the past. As one ages, Ok, as one matures with age, one really understands what Repentance means. Am I also a part of this lot? Guess so…, No; it is a definite Yes. Why else would I say ‘Thanks for being my friend’ after having ignored a ‘cheer up’ sms? All of 22, look back into the so many months that I have been what have I done to repent? Why do I feel guilty? Too many to list, yet for the sake of killing time I shall make an attempt.
Ø Disregard/disrespect for the people who I hold close to heart. It may be because I take them for granted, but alas commitment or relationships don’t seem to weigh more than regard, respect and all that.
Ø Oscillating between love and hatred. [The opposite of love is not hatred, its indifference] if you are thinking ex-boyfriend, well I let romance pass me by. No repentance. But when kith and kin have to bear with such extremes of ones personality, you look back in retrospect and want to correct it.
Ø Not having studied properly
Ø Pizza
Ø Lying
Ø Too much TV
Hmmmph… all those are the cravings that I repent for. What would life be at 70? What are the things that I would repent for? Well, one thing is for sure now, I do repent for having wasted a lot of the earth’s resources, my dad’s money, my mom’s patience, my sister’s time… but at 70? Well I am not so very interested in living till then, am sure I will have to repent for every breathing second then. God Bless

Dated: !4/08/2006